| so its been a while :) |
[Aug. 14th, 2008|02:18 am] |
So its been a while since i have updated and mostly its because i use my myspace blog and i have a private journal but i decided to start writing here again.
So updates in my life: Aunt MaryEllen passed away in january and it was really hard to get over. I miss her and i wish i visited her more in the hospital but i dont do well in hospitals. it sux...i hate that the people in my life keep passing away i know that it happens and they are better off where they are but it sux.
Update 2: I am no longer a college student. I completed my student teaching in december. I was in a 6th grade class and i miss them all the time. They were a great group of kids and they made teachign them so easy. They knew when my teacher was coming and they listened better that day and they were funny. I really miss them and how they sang to me every math class.
Update 3: Unfortunatly, I have no job yet for september..i have been trying to get a job but its hard. I applied to NYC and they keep emailing me so i am guessing they are interested in me and i really hope i hear from them soon.
So i really think that is it...well the big things really...I mean there are always things going on in my life but i guess they arent worth mentioning yet...i mean im working on me and my life and as soon as something happens i will write about it but i dont want to get all excited about something that hasnt happened yet... |
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| :) |
[Jul. 9th, 2007|11:50 pm] |
Erin's and my pick-up lines....what do u think??
My butt is itchy wanna scratch it???
My nose is running wanna pick it??
my teeth are fuzzy wanna brush them??
my zit is puss-ie wanna pop it??
My armpit is smelly...wanna smell it???
I have toe jam wanna eat it??? |
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| how do i??? |
[May. 10th, 2007|11:44 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  content | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | The Walk | ] |
A lot of things can happen in ten years, many births, many deaths graduating from 3 school...alot of things but how can i summarise the past 10 years?? who ever would have thought that I would still be following hanson 10 years later, still acting like im 12?
ITs crazy to say that these boys/men have become my life but its true. I follow them like its a religion. I work for them without being paid, i pay them 40 dollars a year to be apart of the elite and in the fanclub. my aunt said it best when she said i was crazy because i am. Why have i let this happen to my life? Oh yeah i remember, when those boys/men come out on stage and u hear the opening chords of Great Divide or In a Way or any song, there's this rush of energy that really unless you are there, you wouldnt understand. Knowing that everyone of those people in that room are there for the same reason, is an incredible feeling.
many people think im crazy because of all that i do for them. i run the NJST and the DEST, i drive for hours on end to go to a show and those hours on end, arent even at a normal hour, most of the time its like 4 in the morning. and its not so much fighting for the front, it more liek hanging out with the friends that i only see at shows...10 years ago today, the album that changed all of our lives was released, It has been great being a fan for me these past 10 years, it has enabled me to meet many of my bestest/closest friends. I still cant believe that one song about a made up word brought us together. I luv u guys and i hope you have a great day...Thanks for the 10 years of memories...heres to another 10 years!
Here's some quotes that remind me why i am a fan:
"No one really knows what MMMBop means, its about relationships. And those people who are there till the end. You guys are our MMMBop" -Taylor Hanson
"bands like hanson come around once in a lifetime. every time i listen to them i feel like i am in on the biggest secret, that i'm one of the lucky ones who understands what so many people fail to hear. they never cease to amaze me. i know that as long as hanson keeps producing music, i will always be a fan. it's the greatest craziness i've ever known."
Don't tell us we don't have a clue because you are scared that the melody is in our veins. Don't tell us to stop chasing because you have no tour bus to follow. Don't tell us to stop dreaming because you realized you never took the time to fall in love with anything but yourself. Don't tell us we aren't serious because we will show you the brands on our skin. Don't tell us to grow up because you didn't have a silly orange CD to help you through your adolescence. And last but not least, don't tell us we won't survive because we'll all tell you that the music lives. The music lives.
You never forget your first love, whether it was the boy next door or the triple-brother act from Tulsa, Oklahoma, called Hanson.
itz days like today that make being a fan completely worth it. we wait days, weeks, months, and even years, just to get new music. we get teased and tormented for going to best buy and buying the latest cd, but we just shrug it off. we may get upset, but we never show it. but in the end, when i am the one in my room listening to the newest hanson cd, and i have a smile as big as the world on my face, i'm the one that won. im the one who feels happier than ive ever felt. the fact that one band can affect someones life so completely is amazing. so thank you. thank you for being the constant that makes me happy.
so they say...watch me bleed
"Music is about life and emotions and I want people to really, really feel that. I'll be satisfied when I feel like I know I've affected somebody, changed somebody, and they walk out going, 'ah shit that was good,'" –Taylor
"Music cant disappear. Music is the soundtrack of peoples lives. It guides you, it carries you, it helps you through the hard times. It's indispensable." -- Zachary Hanson
Our fans have so much love for us...so I can say if you want to find real love,look in the hearts of our fans and you'll definitely find some there.~Zac Hanson
some people put us through HELL for liking hanson. they look down on us for being
true to something that is important to us. we get teased and tormented, but we
still stand up for what means the most to us. our college roomates make fun of us
to all their friends. our highschool classmates call us babies and tell us to grow
up, but no matter what we stay true. hanson is more than just a band, its a
something. a something that has changed each and every one of our lives in more way
than we can ever begin to explain. so if we walk away from you when you start to
tease us, just remember, that in the end, a hanson fan always wins, because we have
eachother. we may want to kill eachother just to get close to one of the guys, but
no matter what hanson fans win because in the end we have each other and this band... We wont go down..
"to our fans, thank you for all the countless hours spent in line, miles traveled to different cities, states and countries and for showing something true in a world void of passion." - Hanson
Thank-you Ike, Tay and Zac for ten years of music, of something to believe in and turn to when things arent good. Thank you for that silly orange cd that helped define who i am and what i believe in, thank you for giving me the best friends a girl could ask for...
And so they say....I could never let you go after all that youve been to me....
*ha bet u all thought i was gonna say "and so they say watch me bleed" |
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| :( |
[Apr. 15th, 2007|11:02 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  sad | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Sex and the City | ] |
So this past weekend..i was determined to you know actually do some work...and out of the 5 things i had to get done...i only got like 2 of them done..i was such a slacker..ok maybe not a slacker because i did go to work on friday and sunday but its just like i dunno...i feel like i got nothing accomplished...because i guess i didnt. It was just a bad weekend for me:( i dunno why...i was happy until last night but i dont know whats wrong with me...
i told chris last night goodbye...the ball is in his court now..im sick of him not paying attention to me..i get hes recovering but is it so hard to pick up the phone when i call or text...like i dunno i miss him sooo much but im sick of the way hes treating me....
It suxs because i have to run acroos the street to go to the bathroom because ours is broken again.... |
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| This is bullshit!!! |
[Jan. 7th, 2007|07:01 pm] |
Richie is getting a car this week for his b-day which really isnt anything new, we all got them. Jess got 2 because she totaled her first one and I got my ford. Both Jess and I didnt know what we were getting. Well Richie gets to pick out his first car. Jess and I werent allowed to.. this isn't fair and whats worst is that he keeps looking at the Durango...the car that i have wanted for almost 10 years. its not fair...why does he get everything.. also hes getting a newer car then Jess and I did. Ours were each 7 years old Richies gets to be 4 years old..its complete bullshit..i hate him getting everything...its not fair, he has a penis therefore he gets everything he could ever want or need...
Lets see whatelse he gets.... |
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| New Year....New Me |
[Jan. 7th, 2007|12:55 am] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | My room | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  hopeful | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Watching M*A*S*H | ] |
This is the year i change..no longer will i be the shy girl but i will be a confident person.
My goals for this year are simple, yet complex
1. Become more confident
yeah i guess its easy but not for me. I will go out, wether its to Barnes and Nobel to I do my work or to a party or 2 with Beth and Johnna, i will go out more. I will not be shy...i will talk to people, i will participate in class, i will work on me
2. Lose weight
i have stated this in the past but i have a goal this year and im sticking to it. I will go to the gym everyday and do the treadmil or take a class at the gym. I will start to eat salad. I will become more healthier.
I might be going to Vegas this summer in August( to see my uncle George( hes really sick, he cant make it out here) and maybe Chris?!?!) I want to look nice, i want to be comfortable with me..when my mom takes me shopping this spring, i want her to have to buy me clothes that are 2 sizes less then what i am now....
3. I want to like me
i think that i havent taken really good care of me because i dont like me...well the outside of me. I need to like myself and this is the year i will do it.
4. Get a 3.8 this upcoming semester
I was so close this semester to the 3.0.. i had a good semester last time..but not good enough, well not for me at least..ive worked my butt off and im doing it this semester. I have 3 classes and one independent study. Im gonna do well in all of them..i promised 3 important people i would do it and even though they arent here, i have to uphold my end of the deal. |
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| Christmas is 2 months away and its already gonna suck |
[Oct. 14th, 2006|11:23 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | My room | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | melancholy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Grease 2 | ] |
So tonight my mom was talking to my aunt about the chine and glassware and everything else that needs to be split up and no one knows what to do. My mom and Aunt barbara want to hold until a granddaughter gets married and then they get it. And they were talking about christmas and its gonna suck. Worse then when Taryn passed away. 3 people and my dog are gonna be missing. I havent been able to watch White christmas yet, and really i think that i have to watch it soon so i can cry and like it again because i dont, need/want it to be a bad memory because its a good one. This really suxs i just dont know what to do anymore like my year sux but im making them proud, ive been working hard and i havent been going out, im gonna graduate in May and the three of them will be there with me.
Sorry that my posts have been depressing lately, i just cant talk to my mom about it cause it gets her too upset. Today she asked me if they knew about the party last week, and they did, Jess and I talked to them about it in May. and my mom was so happy to hear that they knew and they wanted to help.
Speaking of last week i fell on my ass during cotton eyed Joe and i wasnt even drunk haha but it was a great party and my parents were surprised:) |
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| (no subject) |
[Oct. 4th, 2006|04:40 pm] |
Stolen from Erin
The first five people to respond to this post, will get some form of art, by me, about them. I make no guarantees about quality or type, but I will assure that I will give it good effort and that the art will be individual to you, so if you get a mixed CD or some sort of painting doodle, yours is the only one like it.
The only catch, of course; as with most memes, if you sign up, you have to put this in your own journal as well. |
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| (no subject) |
[Sep. 21st, 2006|01:29 pm] |
| [ | Current Location |
| | My room | ] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | amused | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Hanson | ] |
My apartment is dirty and gross and we have a roommate who wont clean so i took care of it today. Instead of making a chore chart, i wrote these notes and every week ill hang a new one up for us. i know its juvinile but we had to do soemthing myself and beth are sick of doing everything...
I fi
Please take me out tonight.
Love,
The Trash
Make me sparkle…I’m dirty…Please clean me.
Love,
The Kitchen
Do you like being hairy? No, well neither do I…please vacuum me.
Love
The Floor
You wipe your ass, so now wipe me clean too..
Love,
The Bathroom
Do you like being dirty?? Well neither do I…clean me
Love
The Living Room |
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| I wanna be a supermodel |
[Jul. 17th, 2006|11:09 pm] |
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Ok not really but my mother is getting on my nerves..she brought up losing weight again...like im not trying. Im not eating as much and im tired...she thinks i have a sugar problem cause i drink things with sugar...she drinks soda all the time....She wants to make sure im ok...but its getting on my nerves now..everytime she talks to me, its something critiqueing who i am...or how i look...why cant she just accept me as me? |
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| (no subject) |
[Jun. 26th, 2006|08:58 pm] |
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THis sucks...im gonna fail bio.....FUCK!! and my computer is a piece, it was junked today but i wanted to go pick it up and my mother said no because they might need her or my dad there with me..its a bunch of BS!!!! Richie got a new cell phone..again..GRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR |
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| This needs to stop |
[Jun. 17th, 2006|03:24 am] |
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Grandpa just passed away...im very numb and the only person i want to talk to isnt answering his damn phone... |
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| AHHHHHHHH!!!!!!!!!! |
[Jun. 14th, 2006|12:18 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | crappy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Law and Order SUV | ] |
HeartofGold227: can i hate chris??
JoNoNaBaNoNa: sure
HeartofGold227: ok good...i fucking hate him
JoNoNaBaNoNa: lol
JoNoNaBaNoNa: y
HeartofGold227: because hes an arrogant asshole
JoNoNaBaNoNa: oh wow
JoNoNaBaNoNa: aso there will be no more chris
HeartofGold227: never said that...just pissed at him
JoNoNaBaNoNa: ohhhh
HeartofGold227: he called me back..i left him a voice mail apologising cause ive been a brat and he was like just so u know, i have to be out of the house by 10 for physical thearpy and then i go to the gym and then i go skating so ill try and call u in between that
HeartofGold227: does he not fucking realise that i am 3 hours ahead of him?!?!?!?!
HeartofGold227: and im not gonna answer my phone in class...so the only time ill get to talk to him is if i dont fucking sleep
JoNoNaBaNoNa: well you better lol
HeartofGold227: i better what?
JoNoNaBaNoNa: sleep
JoNoNaBaNoNa: l;ol
HeartofGold227: i have been not much but i have been
HeartofGold227: im not making him top proiety in my life..hes a friend who i like but if he cant make time for me..im not fucking staying awake for him!
HeartofGold227: hahaha
JoNoNaBaNoNa: good!
HeartofGold227: hes like ill call u when im done...it wont be too late...wont be too late for who???
JoNoNaBaNoNa: lol
JoNoNaBaNoNa: yeah
HeartofGold227: he doesnt think
HeartofGold227: but i really like him....
HeartofGold227: but if he cant talk to me...why am i trying to talk to him
JoNoNaBaNoNa: yea
JoNoNaBaNoNa: thats good..
JoNoNaBaNoNa: he needs to do just as much effort
HeartofGold227: me and his voicemail..we are best friends...
JoNoNaBaNoNa: HAHAHAHA!!!!
JoNoNaBaNoNa: thats how i was feeling with day day
HeartofGold227: look at this asshole
JoNoNaBaNoNa: by the time we were over...i had all the background convo too
JoNoNaBaNoNa: lol
HeartofGold227: J: u be my gf on here since u won;t go out with me
HeartofGold227: how old are we? 12???
JoNoNaBaNoNa: HAHAHAHAAH!!!!
HeartofGold227: what the fuck?!?!?!
HeartofGold227: im so pissed right now...u would be laughing ur ass off if u were here
JoNoNaBaNoNa: l0l
JoNoNaBaNoNa: prolly
HeartofGold227: AHHHHHHHHH
JoNoNaBaNoNa: hahah
JoNoNaBaNoNa: you are nuts
HeartofGold227: im pissed
HeartofGold227: and hes like honey whats wrong....u fucker i dont want to talk to u!
JoNoNaBaNoNa: tell him hes creepy
JoNoNaBaNoNa: lol
HeartofGold227: B622: so you won't go out with him???
HeartofGold227: HES ONLINE....i dont do the online boyfriends...its like ooo lets make out kissy kissy
HeartofGold227: no!
JoNoNaBaNoNa: JoNoNaBaNoNa: HHHAHAAA!!!
JoNoNaBaNoNa: AND who is that?
HeartofGold227: my friend aron
HeartofGold227: he helped me with my car....night before hanson he was in the car chat room..we are just online friends
HeartofGold227: and as much as i ahte him right now..all i want is chris
on top of this....i have 3 tests this week.... |
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| I Miss my friends from school!! |
[May. 28th, 2006|12:58 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  crazy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Making the Band 3 | ] |
I miss my friends from school....this convo just happened...i miss johnna...and everyone else but no one acts dumb with me besides her...
JoNoNaBaNoNa: im talking to him too
HeartofGold227: u should ask him if he read "tickle his pickel" when he was in KY
JoNoNaBaNoNa: lol
HeartofGold227:
JoNoNaBaNoNa: i dont think he would find that as funny as we would
HeartofGold227: im laughing my ass off right now
JoNoNaBaNoNa: lol
JoNoNaBaNoNa: OMG!!
JoNoNaBaNoNa: lol
HeartofGold227: haha
HeartofGold227:
HeartofGold227: i got bored..we should write a book
JoNoNaBaNoNa: oh god..
JoNoNaBaNoNa: yea
HeartofGold227: about seeing the laughter in any situation...
HeartofGold227: su in the hospital...looking for a book
HeartofGold227: underwear sex
JoNoNaBaNoNa: LOL
HeartofGold227: i think it would be a best seller
JoNoNaBaNoNa: lol
HeartofGold227:
JoNoNaBaNoNa: well we are amazing like that
HeartofGold227: we are...oooo singing to strangers on the street...galavanting
HeartofGold227: Denny's!
JoNoNaBaNoNa: LOL!!!!
JoNoNaBaNoNa: high five!!!!
JoNoNaBaNoNa: shot for shot
HeartofGold227: shot for shot
JoNoNaBaNoNa: fuck the book we need a reality tv shoe
JoNoNaBaNoNa: show
HeartofGold227: hahaha
HeartofGold227: excuse me...how did u get ur food so fast
HeartofGold227: we could call it...Tickle his Pickle
HeartofGold227:
JoNoNaBaNoNa: LOL!!!
HeartofGold227: and our theme song....Since U've been Gone
JoNoNaBaNoNa: that may give ppl the worng idea about us
HeartofGold227: its ok
HeartofGold227: hahaha
HeartofGold227: if they are hot guys...do u care???
HeartofGold227: ok we could call it THP
HeartofGold227: hahaha
JoNoNaBaNoNa: uhh no
JoNoNaBaNoNa: lol
HeartofGold227: haha
HeartofGold227: or it could be excuse....does Burger King Deliver?
JoNoNaBaNoNa: hahahahah |
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| Very Numb right now... |
[May. 14th, 2006|04:34 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sad | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Hanson-WYIYD Brad Paisley- When I Get Where I'm Going | ] |
I'm sitting here just thinking about my grandmother and how i should probably write a speech to say because i'm the second oldest in the family i dont know if my sister can do it..I know what i would say too...i would write about how she has 16 grandkids who loved her dearly and 6 kids who she meant the world too. i would talk abotu my grandfather. I would talk about how she always did her best to get to any game u played in or how she stood in the cold to watch me perform my last guard show... I would talk about how she was the only family member who didnt think i was crazy for seeing Hanson so many times, because she knew they made me happy. I would talk about how she loved Christmas, because family was always together and me and her always baked. I would talk about how she was there for her 15 other grandchildren and how she was trying to knit us all afgans...she was working her way youngest to oldest she only got 4 done...but u know what..its ok because the rest of us will always have memories, the young ones wont....My sister is writing something better i know she is...this is hard.;.no one expected this to happen...my cousin Caroline( who is 7) said it best..."Maybe God took her because she is a good person and he might be sick of the other people to talk to". I will get through this and so will my family...
But for me thank-god for music...
Grandma Kurtz said that I will be the one to make everyone smile..but no pressure... |
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| RIP Grandma |
[May. 12th, 2006|02:37 am] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | sad | ] |
My grandmother passed away a little while ago... |
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| I'm done i quit |
[Apr. 17th, 2006|12:18 pm] |
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I'm done my mother is a bitch and im leaving. I can't stand it here any more all week long shes been telling me whats wrong with me, why cant she look in the fucking mirror. i can't do it anymore....maybe i wont come back from PA in May....i think i should just stay there and leave here. I cant do it anymore, im just so mad here. And what set her off today, Richie couldnt wash his lacross shit......FUCK HIM! my life doesnt revolve around him or lacross and she just sat on the phone eatting MY easter candy talking about how they could help....she never went to shit for the Ramsey Band and Guard Parents Assocataion....it was like she didnt care abotu me or even my sister. Everything at Bosco, shes at with fucking bells on, at RHS, never went to anything except for 3 shows and Gala meetings, and even then she made me feel bad about it.....sorry im just fustrated...i just realised that i only update when someone gets me upset. |
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| I dont know anymore |
[Apr. 3rd, 2006|09:25 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| | melancholy | ] |
| [ | Current Music |
| | Breaking Free-High School Musical | ] |
I'm so confused right now...Beth is acting all weird...i dont really feel like i have any friends right now....and i know thats crazy but its how i feel. I feel like i am just a ride or just someone to borrow money from...im just i dont know anymore.
I take my praxis on Friday...I'm a little scared im gonna go buy the book tomorrow and im hopeing that ill do fine. I did good on the HSPA so I think I will be fine...im confident..i can do math and i can read..i can write...i dont follow the writing process anyway so i will be ok...i just cant over think anything.
My parents are going to FL on Friday for my grandparents 50th anniversary. i wish i was going....
Anyway I'm working my ass off to get good grades this semester. I need all A's and 1 B...im really working hard I want to be a teacher and I need to do better...i just hope its not to late...I'll be ok..no matter what if i have to wait and go an extra semester i will...
Ok i guess im gonna go...ill ttyl |
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| Wow |
[Mar. 29th, 2006|10:53 pm] |
| [ | Current Mood |
| |  loved | ] |
I love how my day can be really crappy and then 1 phone call that lasts 3 minutes and 41 seconds can turn it around........ i really like him...it sucks that he lives in LV........ |
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| (no subject) |
[Mar. 3rd, 2006|07:37 pm] |
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I havent even been home a full day and my mother is already being well herself...my brother acts like hes the gift to the world cause he goes to the private high school. Tonight she told me I need to act like the adult when he gets like im mightier then everyone....because u know she made him apologise...hes an asshole and i hope...no i pray he doesnt make lacross...that will piss off but it wouldnt his fault...everyone elses but his..im sick of him and my mother....can i stay in my room all of break?? is that bad thats all i want....i dont want to be here...i cant stand anyone anymore...i kow i sound like a brat but no one knows what i live with....i dont know why i wanted to come home so much........ |
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itzallimliving4's journal
pissed off